Unemployment Part 4 - Northern Thailand

Our trip (the plural here being Dakota, Michael, Drew, Jordan, and I) was part of a bigger travel group through Contiki. For those of you who have heard of Contiki, you'll have some preconceived ideas about it - namely it consisting of 18-20 year-olds who drink themselves into a stupor on random beaches. This isn't entirely inaccurate, though we knowingly and deliberately chose a trip that was more cultural and less adventurous.

In Thailand 'more cultural' means that instead of heading south from Bangkok into the party island-hopping scene, we took an overnight train north to Chiang Mai. Overnight trains are a pretty foreign concept to people outside of Europe and Asia. My perception beforehand was that they were archaic - an old-fashioned way to slowly get from one point to another while trying to avoid getting Agatha Christie-style murdered. And while still slow, even in Thailand they are quite comfortable, modern. and also pretty cool. Especially if the trip is with a group of good friends and new friends (effectively taking over an entire car), and especially if the Contiki trip manager, Shan, gives you her backup Halloween costume a week in advance.

Not pictured - Jordan parading the suit up and down the train car at 10 pm.

Each seat on a Thai overnight train flips down into an agreeable bed. Though I should point out that sleeping conditions aren't that great, especially on the top bunk (as Rhiannon has pointed out in her travel blog). We had a good 15 hours of food, cards (in one of the strangest revelations of the trip Emma from Sydney knew how to play Euchre!), and monotone train rumble to get to know our fellow world travelers.

In Chiang Mai the next morning, the majority of our group went on a 4-5 hour trip to an elephant sanctuary. The pictures from that looked really fun - bathing with elephants, feeding elephants, sliding down muddy hills with elephants - but Michael and I decided to stay behind and enjoy our hotel pool, a massage, and Chiang Mai's curiously fun 3D Art Museum with Emma and Shan.

Philadelphia meets Thailand.

Most scenes have a 'Take photo from here' spot that emphasizes the perspective.

"But I don't want to be shown a whole new world."

Northern Thai food holds a strange, cult-like fascination among foodies. With its eclectic mix of spices, fresh veggies, pork (mainly deep-fried but also minced), and mango sticky rice that makes my mouth water as I type this, it really does stand out. Chiang Mai, being the largest city in northern Thailand, is the epicenter for this culinary genre. That evening we took part in a cooking class hosted by Perm and his immodestly named "The best thai cookery school," which begins in the Chiang Mai market before mini-busing to his facility nestled among idyllic rice paddies.

Learning about ginger or something.

This one is really hot, and this one...is also really hot.

Not a bad view to mince garlic to.

In probably the most miraculous part of this experience, every single person in our group lit a fireball and no one got injured. 

Does food taste better or worse after a near death experience?

That evening we went back to the market, which sounds tame and wholesome until you realize that it was to watch a ladyboy cabaret show. This might seem ludicrous to some of my more conservative readers, but it's actually an extremely entertaining show filled with lights, dancing, strutting, comedy, overtly feminine dress and makeup covering covertly masculine frames, and just a little bit too much crowd interaction...

But first Michael and I had to get our feet nibbled at the night market - strangely satisfying.

Dakota really embracing his Thai Rihanna.

A bunch of guys from our group, including Michael and I, were dragged backstage, forced to put on wigs and dresses, and then paraded around on stage for several minutes. I hated it in the moment, but remember it now with only moderate disgust.

With the shame of the night before fresh in our minds, we set off from Chiang Mai, leaving much to be hopefully explored on future visits. Our last stop in Thailand before crossing into Laos was Chiang Rai, the oldest city in Thailand. I don't remember a whole lot about Chiang Rai, other than a few interesting stops in and around the city. First, Cabbages and Condoms. This pit stop restaurant and shop and small peacock zoo (?) was set up to promote family planning and HIV/AIDS prevention with the idea that "condoms should be as ubiquitous as cabbages." Anyway we stopped and took a group picture.

Nothing screams sexual safety like cartoon condoms. 

Second was Wat Rong Khun, more commonly called the White Temple. It's strange, out in the middle of nowhere. It gushes with eye-catching sculptures and shapes, not to mention a shininess that made me feel like I needed blinders just to walk through it. 

Manicured. Serene.

Oh, this is not what I was expecting.

Seems a little ornate for a Buddhist temple.

Are those hands?! 

And finally, Chiang Rai's lovely little night market, where the spiciest hot pots were served over burning coals. As if we needed more heat added to our oppressively muggy environment.

Very thankful for approximate English translations at most night markets in Asia.

Next up:  we go very remote on a riverboat trip down the Mekong in Laos.

Cheers!

Bonus:  more Asia animals!

In most versions of my memories of this trip, I don't regret missing the elephants.
But looking at pics like this summons creeping remorse.

This bird bit my finger ten seconds after this photo. I don't think I contracted anything.

Our northern Thailand coach bus had a creepy knockoff Finding Nemo theme. We lovingly called it "Searching for Gleemo."

Unemployment - Part 3: Bangkok

Greetings from Bangkok, smirk central.

The blog has now officially left New Zealand! For the next several posts I'll detail a month+ of  travel in southeast Asia with Dakota, Michael, Drew, Jordan and Rhiannon - the first two weeks with the guys. This type of boys trip is not entirely original, and may even be plagiarism. With the movie industry using it as a location to signify crazy partying youths, like in The Hangover Part II, The Beach, and the classic film Forrest Gump (okay, maybe not that third one), tourism is big business in southeast Asia. And I'm all about giving to local economies or whatever.

The region is big, both in terms of covered area and population, comprising of Thailand, Myanmar (Burma), Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, and Malaysia before turning into a number of island nations. This basically means that in 4 weeks of travel, it's impossible to cover all of it. And quite frankly, so much would be glossed over in that amount of time it would be criminal. I liken it to trying to do a massive Euro-trip in a month. We set out in stages, guided by our Contiki tour through northern Thailand, Laos, and a quick stop in Cambodia. Before jumping into it, though, the guys and I had a few days to kill in Bangkok, the capital of Thailand.

Travelling is often about culture shocks, and is a repeated theme across this and many other similar blogs. Nowhere else in the world is there a bigger culture shock, I think, than in Bangkok. The weather is hot and sticky and smoggy. As soon as you hit the streets, you are caught up in a jumble of noise and people and traffic and looming concrete. 

The morass of scooters is always bearing down. 

Chao Praya River, a main thoroughfare for marine public transportation.
Long skinny boats are outfitted with handheld motors and over-packed with locals.

All of this pales in comparison to the engulfment in Bangkok's smells. And while some of them are pleasant or even alluring - ambiguous street meats and stir-frys, wafting incense, and succulent fruits - most are desperately disgusting and induce a scrunched-up face.

The side canal seems like a nice respite from the crush of people until you breath in.

Towering concrete structures, narrow sidewalks, hawkers selling their knock-off goods, and tuk-tuk drivers constantly trying to talk you into a ride make Bangkok feel very packed-in. Any shred of agoraphobia rises to the surface with a short walk down the street. This was especially true during our visit as Bangkok turned into a national gathering spot to mourn the beloved King Bhumibol Adulyadej, who had passed away one week earlier. Nonetheless, we soldiered into the masses to visit the national gallery, and the massive reclining buddha and stupas in Wat Pho.

Major streets were shut down near the Grand Palace, where mourners congregated to pay their respects.

I'm terrified to fight one of these when they eventually come alive in my nightmares.

Stupas contain the relics of kings or famous monks. In Bangkok they are ornate.

Despite overwhelming heat and consequent dripping sweat, I really enjoyed walking through this part of Bangkok.

Kate Winslet's inspiration for her Titanic pose.

Note all of us wearing our dark 'mourning' clothing, as if we were actually going to fit in.

Nights in Bangkok are notorious for their danger, cheap alcohol, and immorality. Though we didn't pay for or witness any ping pong shows, I'll never forget our short stint in the Patpong night market:  Michael buying a knock-off Bluetooth speaker, stumbling through endless and stifling aisles of cheap goods, and being briefly pulled into the shadiest dance club (which I will only say would be illegal in most western countries). On the eve before we left Bangkok, we met our Contiki group and had a night out on Khao San road, Bangkok's backpacker haven. Here one can buy anything, for next to nothing:  dollar street kebab (maybe the best thing I ate in Asia), BBQ scorpions on a stick, fresh mango sticky rice, $3 half hour Thai massage, 9 liters of beer served in a tapped barrel at your table, elephant pants in all colors and sizes, and even USA sports memorabilia.

Jordan couldn't resist.

A Khao San Road restaurant. I try to keep a calm demeanor despite the demon over my shoulder.

Bangkok is cool. Strangely, despite the culture shocks around each and every corner (oh I forgot to mention the park Dakota and I went where hundreds of people were jogging in their everyday clothes at 10 pm...so strange), I find myself wanting to return and sample more of the bustling city's sights and foods. 

And finally, I'll be ending every post about Asia with a few photos of the countless animals (domesticated or otherwise) we saw along the way:

Wat Pho kitties pretending to be wild jungle cats.

At the Jim Thompson house, the vicious pond turtle stalks and devours its unsuspecting prey.

Cheers!