Unemployment Part 4 - Northern Thailand

Our trip (the plural here being Dakota, Michael, Drew, Jordan, and I) was part of a bigger travel group through Contiki. For those of you who have heard of Contiki, you'll have some preconceived ideas about it - namely it consisting of 18-20 year-olds who drink themselves into a stupor on random beaches. This isn't entirely inaccurate, though we knowingly and deliberately chose a trip that was more cultural and less adventurous.

In Thailand 'more cultural' means that instead of heading south from Bangkok into the party island-hopping scene, we took an overnight train north to Chiang Mai. Overnight trains are a pretty foreign concept to people outside of Europe and Asia. My perception beforehand was that they were archaic - an old-fashioned way to slowly get from one point to another while trying to avoid getting Agatha Christie-style murdered. And while still slow, even in Thailand they are quite comfortable, modern. and also pretty cool. Especially if the trip is with a group of good friends and new friends (effectively taking over an entire car), and especially if the Contiki trip manager, Shan, gives you her backup Halloween costume a week in advance.

Not pictured - Jordan parading the suit up and down the train car at 10 pm.

Each seat on a Thai overnight train flips down into an agreeable bed. Though I should point out that sleeping conditions aren't that great, especially on the top bunk (as Rhiannon has pointed out in her travel blog). We had a good 15 hours of food, cards (in one of the strangest revelations of the trip Emma from Sydney knew how to play Euchre!), and monotone train rumble to get to know our fellow world travelers.

In Chiang Mai the next morning, the majority of our group went on a 4-5 hour trip to an elephant sanctuary. The pictures from that looked really fun - bathing with elephants, feeding elephants, sliding down muddy hills with elephants - but Michael and I decided to stay behind and enjoy our hotel pool, a massage, and Chiang Mai's curiously fun 3D Art Museum with Emma and Shan.

Philadelphia meets Thailand.

Most scenes have a 'Take photo from here' spot that emphasizes the perspective.

"But I don't want to be shown a whole new world."

Northern Thai food holds a strange, cult-like fascination among foodies. With its eclectic mix of spices, fresh veggies, pork (mainly deep-fried but also minced), and mango sticky rice that makes my mouth water as I type this, it really does stand out. Chiang Mai, being the largest city in northern Thailand, is the epicenter for this culinary genre. That evening we took part in a cooking class hosted by Perm and his immodestly named "The best thai cookery school," which begins in the Chiang Mai market before mini-busing to his facility nestled among idyllic rice paddies.

Learning about ginger or something.

This one is really hot, and this one...is also really hot.

Not a bad view to mince garlic to.

In probably the most miraculous part of this experience, every single person in our group lit a fireball and no one got injured. 

Does food taste better or worse after a near death experience?

That evening we went back to the market, which sounds tame and wholesome until you realize that it was to watch a ladyboy cabaret show. This might seem ludicrous to some of my more conservative readers, but it's actually an extremely entertaining show filled with lights, dancing, strutting, comedy, overtly feminine dress and makeup covering covertly masculine frames, and just a little bit too much crowd interaction...

But first Michael and I had to get our feet nibbled at the night market - strangely satisfying.

Dakota really embracing his Thai Rihanna.

A bunch of guys from our group, including Michael and I, were dragged backstage, forced to put on wigs and dresses, and then paraded around on stage for several minutes. I hated it in the moment, but remember it now with only moderate disgust.

With the shame of the night before fresh in our minds, we set off from Chiang Mai, leaving much to be hopefully explored on future visits. Our last stop in Thailand before crossing into Laos was Chiang Rai, the oldest city in Thailand. I don't remember a whole lot about Chiang Rai, other than a few interesting stops in and around the city. First, Cabbages and Condoms. This pit stop restaurant and shop and small peacock zoo (?) was set up to promote family planning and HIV/AIDS prevention with the idea that "condoms should be as ubiquitous as cabbages." Anyway we stopped and took a group picture.

Nothing screams sexual safety like cartoon condoms. 

Second was Wat Rong Khun, more commonly called the White Temple. It's strange, out in the middle of nowhere. It gushes with eye-catching sculptures and shapes, not to mention a shininess that made me feel like I needed blinders just to walk through it. 

Manicured. Serene.

Oh, this is not what I was expecting.

Seems a little ornate for a Buddhist temple.

Are those hands?! 

And finally, Chiang Rai's lovely little night market, where the spiciest hot pots were served over burning coals. As if we needed more heat added to our oppressively muggy environment.

Very thankful for approximate English translations at most night markets in Asia.

Next up:  we go very remote on a riverboat trip down the Mekong in Laos.

Cheers!

Bonus:  more Asia animals!

In most versions of my memories of this trip, I don't regret missing the elephants.
But looking at pics like this summons creeping remorse.

This bird bit my finger ten seconds after this photo. I don't think I contracted anything.

Our northern Thailand coach bus had a creepy knockoff Finding Nemo theme. We lovingly called it "Searching for Gleemo."

Unemployment - Part 3: Bangkok

Greetings from Bangkok, smirk central.

The blog has now officially left New Zealand! For the next several posts I'll detail a month+ of  travel in southeast Asia with Dakota, Michael, Drew, Jordan and Rhiannon - the first two weeks with the guys. This type of boys trip is not entirely original, and may even be plagiarism. With the movie industry using it as a location to signify crazy partying youths, like in The Hangover Part II, The Beach, and the classic film Forrest Gump (okay, maybe not that third one), tourism is big business in southeast Asia. And I'm all about giving to local economies or whatever.

The region is big, both in terms of covered area and population, comprising of Thailand, Myanmar (Burma), Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, and Malaysia before turning into a number of island nations. This basically means that in 4 weeks of travel, it's impossible to cover all of it. And quite frankly, so much would be glossed over in that amount of time it would be criminal. I liken it to trying to do a massive Euro-trip in a month. We set out in stages, guided by our Contiki tour through northern Thailand, Laos, and a quick stop in Cambodia. Before jumping into it, though, the guys and I had a few days to kill in Bangkok, the capital of Thailand.

Travelling is often about culture shocks, and is a repeated theme across this and many other similar blogs. Nowhere else in the world is there a bigger culture shock, I think, than in Bangkok. The weather is hot and sticky and smoggy. As soon as you hit the streets, you are caught up in a jumble of noise and people and traffic and looming concrete. 

The morass of scooters is always bearing down. 

Chao Praya River, a main thoroughfare for marine public transportation.
Long skinny boats are outfitted with handheld motors and over-packed with locals.

All of this pales in comparison to the engulfment in Bangkok's smells. And while some of them are pleasant or even alluring - ambiguous street meats and stir-frys, wafting incense, and succulent fruits - most are desperately disgusting and induce a scrunched-up face.

The side canal seems like a nice respite from the crush of people until you breath in.

Towering concrete structures, narrow sidewalks, hawkers selling their knock-off goods, and tuk-tuk drivers constantly trying to talk you into a ride make Bangkok feel very packed-in. Any shred of agoraphobia rises to the surface with a short walk down the street. This was especially true during our visit as Bangkok turned into a national gathering spot to mourn the beloved King Bhumibol Adulyadej, who had passed away one week earlier. Nonetheless, we soldiered into the masses to visit the national gallery, and the massive reclining buddha and stupas in Wat Pho.

Major streets were shut down near the Grand Palace, where mourners congregated to pay their respects.

I'm terrified to fight one of these when they eventually come alive in my nightmares.

Stupas contain the relics of kings or famous monks. In Bangkok they are ornate.

Despite overwhelming heat and consequent dripping sweat, I really enjoyed walking through this part of Bangkok.

Kate Winslet's inspiration for her Titanic pose.

Note all of us wearing our dark 'mourning' clothing, as if we were actually going to fit in.

Nights in Bangkok are notorious for their danger, cheap alcohol, and immorality. Though we didn't pay for or witness any ping pong shows, I'll never forget our short stint in the Patpong night market:  Michael buying a knock-off Bluetooth speaker, stumbling through endless and stifling aisles of cheap goods, and being briefly pulled into the shadiest dance club (which I will only say would be illegal in most western countries). On the eve before we left Bangkok, we met our Contiki group and had a night out on Khao San road, Bangkok's backpacker haven. Here one can buy anything, for next to nothing:  dollar street kebab (maybe the best thing I ate in Asia), BBQ scorpions on a stick, fresh mango sticky rice, $3 half hour Thai massage, 9 liters of beer served in a tapped barrel at your table, elephant pants in all colors and sizes, and even USA sports memorabilia.

Jordan couldn't resist.

A Khao San Road restaurant. I try to keep a calm demeanor despite the demon over my shoulder.

Bangkok is cool. Strangely, despite the culture shocks around each and every corner (oh I forgot to mention the park Dakota and I went where hundreds of people were jogging in their everyday clothes at 10 pm...so strange), I find myself wanting to return and sample more of the bustling city's sights and foods. 

And finally, I'll be ending every post about Asia with a few photos of the countless animals (domesticated or otherwise) we saw along the way:

Wat Pho kitties pretending to be wild jungle cats.

At the Jim Thompson house, the vicious pond turtle stalks and devours its unsuspecting prey.

Cheers!

Unemployment - Part 2: North Island

North Island? You mean New Zealand's North Island? Didn't you live there for over a year and write about it a lot? Yeah, I did, but this is different I promise. For starters, I was travelling outside of Auckland. For seconds, I was with a new travel group - the entire Morgan family (Dakota and his parents Kathy and Bill). For thirds, why do you need three reasons? It's my blog.

Again because of time constraints (Dakota and I had a flight to Asia to catch), we only had 4 days to peruse some of Auckland's closer sights. We started on day one with a wine tour on Waiheke Island, about which I've written roughly a year ago. It was a lovely day typical of Auckland spring weather - cloudy and windy, threats of rain with the sun peeking through intermittently. 

Look who joined us!

I'm sure there's a part of my brain that is storing specific detail about each of the wineries we visited and the wines we tried. But at this moment jumping to the forefront of my memory are the tour guides (a Frenchman, an Argentinian, and a Dutchman) and their respective swooning sexualizations of each vino we sipped. It was pleasing and engaging and inebriating...and felt ephemeral. Suddenly we were finished with the last tasting and taking a group photo on the top of a windswept hill.

Steady, Eric, steady.

Goodbye alcohol producing isle. The maritime Red Ensign, I think, should replace the current NZ flag.

After a relaxing night in Auckland, the Morgans and I embarked in our rental car (named Steve-3PO), first stopping to give me a final climb up Mt. Eden. This is my favorite destination in Auckland, namely as a running and reading venue, but also for the splendid 360 degree city views.

Also a good spot to get some push-ups in. Good form Daks.

We ventured out of Auckland city congestion and into the stereotypical New Zealand green hills flocked with sheep and cows. Lake Taupo, our destination, is a place I had actually not been to despite my many excursions out of Auckland. Just a 3.5 hour drive south, the lake is a freshwater filled caldera, a result of the world's largest eruption in the past 70,000 years. It's located in the highly active geothermic center of the North Island, and for that reason garners a lot of tourism...during the tourist season. We were there in mid-October, just before the deluge of tour buses and German backpackers besieged the area. 

Just outside of our rustic hotel. The lake stretches out of sight to the west.

A black swan in the surf of Lake Taupo. I am fascinated by yet hate swan necks.

Lake Taupo is only another hour or so drive south to Tongariro National Park. The terrain along the route morphs from rocky lakeside to alpine, with towering pine trees and dry lowland tussocks dominating the scenery. With each passing turn, a snow-capped peak comes into view. This is Mt Ruapehu, where the North Island skiing enthusiasts come to ply their trade on the Whakapapa ski field (pronounced 'Fah-kah-pa-pa). As an aside, I'm going to miss the strange and fun Maori names in New Zealand. We only had a few hours to explore, so we drove up to the park and went for two short hikes to a scenic overlook and to a rocky waterfall.

A cloud-cap for your snow-cap?

Dakota never fears a cliff's edge.

The rest of the day was spent watching a sunset, eating at a restaurant where Dakota ordered a raw steak and a hot stone on which to cook it (?), and enjoying a few local brews. The next day we set out north and east toward the Coromandel Peninsula. First we stopped to watch the opening of a dam on the Waikato River,

Aratiatia Rapids. The water's power is impressive and pee-inducing. Let's just call it impressively pee-inducing.

and to cross over the Mamaku ranges into the beautiful beach port city of Tauranga (the largest port in New Zealand),

Looking south over the isthmus from atop Mt. Maunganui.

before heading up the east coast of the North Island into the Coromandel Peninsula. I've had a run-in or two with the Coromandel, most notably in October 2015 when I contracted some terrible food poisoning at a holiday park and lost a night of sleep and several pounds. Rhiannon and I also spent a wonderful Easter weekend drinking and eating at a resort on the peninsula, so I have mixed feelings about it. 

We stayed at an old Methodist church called The Church, converted into a restaurant and small stand alone rentals. It was just a few minutes walk away from Hahei beach, a local brewery called The Pour House, and the trail to Cathedral Cove. It was a pretty fun couple of days.

Panorama of Gemstone Bay.

High tide on the far side of Cathedral cove forces a hiking up of shorts to get back through the cave on the right.

Friends aren't afraid of showing physical affection.

We also spent a few hours dredging our own spa pools at Hot Water Beach just down the road. I've found over the past year that digging holes in beaches is a very fun activity at any age. 

It's all about the balance of scalding incoming water, depth, and a quick release outflow.

The Morgan family gets in on the push-up craze. All perfect form.

After just a short few days we were on our way back to Auckland, stopping first in Piha to take in some misty views. The Morgans are a delightful family, so calm and collected and sure of themselves. They are equally delightful travel companions - willing to change plans on the fly, unafraid of trying new things, and generous to a fault. I'll always remember Bill and Kathy passing freshly crafted PB&J sandwiches up from the back seat as Dakota and I navigated Steve-3PO around the North Island.

As I sat at the Auckland airport with Dakota that evening for a flight bound to Bangkok via Singapore, I was abruptly melancholy to be leaving. This was Thursday October 20th, my last few hours in Auckland and New Zealand, and I was unsure of my when next visit might be. Fifteen months of exploring LOTR country, being remote beyond anything I had experienced before, and making a slew of new friends, all of it felt suddenly left behind. In my past. Travelling to new places and a new life feels lonely and intimidating, no matter how well planned it is.

New Zealand:  come for the views, stay for the people, leave but never forget!

Cheers!

A last necessary stop at Rhiannon's mom's place to see this listless and impassive fluff ball.