The Real World: Auckland

This is the true story, of 5 strangers, living in a house. Find out what happens, when people stop being polite, and start getting real. The Real World:  Auckland.

Please don't sue me MTV.

Meet the cast:

Sefton (male, 26?) - With the glasses, formal speech, and a swagger to his walk, it's obvious from the start that Sefton (great name, pronounced here like 'Siftin') is the man in charge of the flat. He runs the finances and keeps everyone in line, but is really fun and easy to chat with. He also plays guitar, skis, and is a litigation lawyer. I'm going to go ahead and label him as the wildcard of the group.

Walter (male, 24) - He's tall, goofy, energetic, and extremely outgoing and enthusiastic. He recently decided to get into the real estate game, and took me on an hour long drive where he stopped at random houses to cold-call-ask if they were willing to sell to him. Most interestingly, he's a beloved national kids TV celebrity, and this bio page says everything else there is to say about him.

Louis (all man, old enough to party) - The House's resident bad boy and an all around cheeky fellow, he is often seen wearing a gray beanie, confusingly covering his beautifully manicured golden Marco Reus hair. He works in advertising, and that's all I know about his job. I'm also his semi-permanent replacement on his soccer team while he's out of town or injured or both.

Alex (female, 22) - The only non-man in the flat is our resident mom. She is frequently spotted waddling around in a large zebra-striped robe and slippers. She's friendly, culinary-adept, works as a manager at an extremely expensive clothing store, and took the time to explain to me the many local words and phrases I wasn't up to snuff on. So I made a list**:

Mostly food-based. I think Louis was having a little fun with the ketchup thing. But I'm honestly not sure. Also, I like the idea of zucchini sounding like 'corgi.'

Eric (male, 27) - Guy with the funny accent who doesn't pick up on about 34% of the conversations happening around him. He's the guy everyone likes to laugh at, but thinks they're laughing with him. He's just here for a good time.

So there's the cast. I'm expecting a season of twists and turns, highs and lows, lefts and rights, and some stuff that doesn't evoke opposites. Here is a screenshot from the movie a few of us watched together the first night I lived here (I should mention that it was not my idea, though I had seen it 4 times already):

"Yeah, that's my bicep."

Cheers!

**Other things I've been told about Kiwi English:
- Place names starting with 'wh' are said with an 'f' sound.
Example:  Whangarei (city in the north), pronounced:  Funga-ray
- Place names starting with 'one' are pronounced 'oh-nay'.
Example:  Onehunga, pronounced:  oh-nay-hung-a
- If someone says 'nah yeah' it means 'yes.' Conversely if they say 'yeah nah' it means 'no.'
- People not from Auckland call Aucklanders 'jafas,' which is a deprecatory acronym standing for 'Just Another Fucking Aucklander.'